12 weeks ... and 12 months

12 weeks today, and I'm feeling great! Things are going so well that, at Mr. Rhody's urging, I have decided to let the cat out of the bag this week. I had originally planned to wait for Thanksgiving and the week after, but my body seems to have other ideas. I'll have to start posting pictures soon, but, when I wear maternity pants, I have a serious baby belly these days! I'm so surprised, and I had thought I wouldn't get anything like that for a few more weeks. I'm not complaining though, I am enjoying every minute of this.

Some people might even say I'm in the second trimester as of this morning. In fact, Mr. Rhody and my mother have already said so. Mr. Rhody and I got to hear the baby's heartbeat this morning, so I am feeling very optimistic. Physically, I'm still feeling very tired and a bit sore, but great other than that. I told my mother this weekend that I was tired all of the time recently, to which she replied, "Just wait until you have to go home to nap in the middle of the day!" Thanks, mom. It's good to know that she's thinking of me though.

On the other side of things, 12 months ago today I got my first positive pregnancy test. I can't believe it's only been a year; so much has happened in the past 12 months. When we started this journey, I expected it to take a few months to get me pregnant, but I never expected to lose a baby--and most certainly not two of them! One of the saddest things that's happened in this past year is that I lost a very good friend, someone that I'd considered one of my best friends, because she had a hard time dealing with my losses. I miss her every day, but I know she had to do what she needed to do for herself. Instead, I've met and surrounded myself with so many wonderful, supportive women. I love that I have this group to share my every day with; I love that they seem to "get" me.

Today, I know so much more about my body than I did 12 months ago, from reading cervical fluid to the smallest genetic details. While I'm sad that two lives were lost on our journey to get here, I see this as a journey of discovery, and I know that each of those two babies contributed in their little way. I love and appreciate my body more every day. I love and appreciate this baby growing within me more than I ever knew that was possible. While I miss the two that I've lost, I am looking forward to meeting this child in 6 more months. Baby Rhody is my constant reminder that we can both respect the past and continue moving forward.